Remarkably Awful, John King

“Elvis or Johnny Cash?” “Dancing With the Stars or American Idol?” “Leno or Conan?”

You’re kidding me, right? Four wars, unprosecuted financial robber-barons, eroding civil liberties, unprecedented attacks on democratic unions, and an insanely bloated military industrial complex.

Go f*ck yourself, John.

(Stewart’s take-down of the whole ridiculous charade here.)

 

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LucasFilm is Officially Creatively Bankrupt

In this trailer, devil-horned Obi Wan Kenobi and hot manga apprentice Lucia Skywalker escort space cowboy/smuggler Indiana Jones Solo towards a courtroom/jail cell, when SUDDENLY- Lucia, what do you sense? “Darkness.” Jesus, not darkness!

Sith Attack!!!

Thank God Indiana Solo has the fastest ship in the galaxy. He can “get ‘er out on the Falcon.” Let’s go!!!

Uh-oh. Here come the Sith. How many lightsabers? I don’t know. How many can you EFFING HANDLE, CHUMP?!?

Thank the Maker that Obi Wan DevilHornObi can sacrifice himself so that Lucia can Jackie Chan her way to the Falcon and they can “get to those guns/don’t get cocky kid” while getting ready for the hyperdrive and fly through a Destroyer like a Death Star trench and then they can OH WHO GIVES TWO SHITS.

Have none of these guys watched Red Letter Media?

That being said, the thing is effin’ gorgeous. The uncanny valley is almost gone, the movement is fluid, the sets are unbelievable, and the overall design is really spectacular. It’s a beautiful trailer that could’ve been directed by Micheal Bay. Every character looks like a superhero (yawn). The tropes are all there, in mind-numbingly predictable fashion. If everyone in your “film” (even if created by CG) is beautiful (or beautifully scarred/ugly/EVIL), well, your story probably sucks. And this one does.

But none of this should stop Lucas from casting me in the live action Star Wars. Just sayin’. I’d ugly up that stuff with some authentic cynicism, lemme tell ya.

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American Tourists are the Worst

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Andrew Napolitano and Shep Smith on the Wikileaks Debacle

Ah. Reasoned and intelligent discourse from Fox News.

Wait. What?

I was as shocked as anyone. Shep Smith and Napolitano remain the only two sane voices in a loud bowling alley of troglodytes. More transparency now, please.

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Banky’s Exit Through the Gift Shop Film Trailer

I cannot wait to see this. The scene in the trailer where Banksy scales the wall effortlessly to escape the cops is tre´ Ninja.

This, to me, is the purest example of art needing a valve. When people will risk criminal prosecution to exercise free speech, creativity, and really, hard-ass-work, I think there’s a pretty compelling case for the world always getting its prophets when it needs them.

It’s just a ride.- Bill Hicks

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Andrew Sullivan on Obama and his Pivotal Presidency

The best 1st year assessment I’ve seen so far. From his blog post:

…Obama is on notice that, whatever the enormity of the mess he inherited, the opposition has no sense of responsibility for any of it and will blame him for everything and anything. All he has going for him is the American public’s ability to see through the dust and fury to the realities beneath.

Sullivan’s blog has been invaluable reading this year for me. From his Iranian revolution coverage, to his pragmatic yet measured scrutiny of Obama himself, he and The Colbert Report have been air to me in a year when the atmosphere was polluted beyond recognition. Kudos, Mr. Sullivan. And to you, Mr. President.

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